LIFE COACHING 101

What is a ”Life Coach” and why do I need one?

We all experience times when life seems too certain or too uncertain. We sometimes develop patterns that seem unbreakable. A life coach can help you to break those patterns by examining your 6 Human Needs, assessing your beliefs and honestly considering the decisions that you have made in the past and continue to make today. What decisions did you make early in life that have determined the path that your life has taken? Did you decide not to become like your parents or have you spent your life trying to seek their approval? Patterns such as these are not who we are but what we “do”. This knowledge can be used to help you to find your own power so that you can change the “stuck” that you are in. In doing so, you can have that happiness and joy that you crave and desire. A Life Coach will give you the tools that you need to make this happen for yourself.

What are some of the strategies that a life coach uses?

One of the major patterns that people get “stuck” in is the “Crazy 8” pattern (it resembles a figure 8). When a person feels a strong emotion, such as “sadness” and the person does not know what to do with this emotion they may quickly gravitate toward “anger”. Which side they gravitate to first depends on what that person values more. Take a look at yourself. When you are engaged in an argument with another person, do you feel an extreme emotion and then swing into another extreme emotion? It is human nature to move out of an extreme emotion after a period of time because the body and spirit need rest from the emotion. Have you ever noticed that when a person is crying, they eventually stop crying. If a person is angry, they will eventually stop being angry. If the problem that caused the extreme emotion is not dealt with then the swing from one to another will continue until the mind, body or spirit are exhausted. When a person falls into this dilemma, a Life Coach teaches that person to stop the addiction of Crazy 8 by redirecting the person. An example would be: A wife is angry with her husband. He doesn’t respond the way that she believes that he should to her anger. After a while, she moves to crying so that he will give her the attention that she believes that she needs. If that doesn’t work then she moves again to anger, and so on. A Life Coach would teach her that she can stop the craziness any time that she wants to by simply redirecting her own thinking and how she communicates her feelings to her husband. The way out of this craziness is UP! Life Coaches teach people to change their rules and their model of the world.

Another strategy of importance is “Learning to overcome self-sabotage”. How many times have you set a personal goal and did not complete the goal? Chances are that those situations are many rather than few. We can and do make lists for our personal goals, wishes, or desires. We dream of accomplishing something that we have always wanted to do. What stands in our way? The answer very often is self-sabotage. We allow our fears of success or failure get in the way of simply doing the next task that will lead us toward the goal we have set for ourselves. A way to redress this pattern is to change the way we look at our personal goals. If you have decided to go on a weight loss diet and have failed on that diet even once, this is why. You have made a decision to follow a program and to see it through. The diet gets boring and you lose heart. Soon enough you return to the exact same eating pattern. What if you didn’t diet? What if you simply started eating foods that are good for you in a balanced way? What if you just took a walk each day in order to be with nature and find some peace. The natural by-product of that way of eating and movement will produce weight loss. What diet?

Have you been afraid to express your thoughts, feelings and emotions for fear of being shunned? Do you keep a wall between yourself and others? All humans use defense mechanisms in order to preserve our inner world (our identity). We will do and say almost anything to protect that person within us. This is the very most private part of our nature. This is the space that we can say and think whatever we want to without any social consequences. This is the space that we really do tell our friend that she/he is being an idiot. Some of us have mastered the art of masking those thoughts and feelings so well that we have lost touch with what it feels like to actually take a risk and say what we think. We are hypnotized by societies rules and demands. Over time, the risk to step outside the box becomes seemingly insurmountable. The fear of feeling uncomfortable becomes so great that in order to survive, we decide to take that self we know and tuck him/her away. So what do you do about that? A Life Coach will teach you how to breakthrough that hypnosis and strive to be the person that you really do love deep inside of you. You know…. the one that laughs at inappropriate times? We often hear people say this wonderful comment. “I cannot wait until I get old so that I can say whatever I want, to whomever I want and whenever I want. Everybody excuses old people!” Does this sound familiar to you? Who said you can’t do that now? Who made the rule that you can’t speak your mind until you are aged? We don’t deliberately hurt people but if someone feels hurt by what we say then usually that person is the one who needs to look at themselves and their reactions. Be honest with yourself and others by speaking your mind! Then you can hope to not only get back in touch with that person inside of you but you will find the joy in sharing him/her with those around you.

All problems are emotional! If a person changes an emotion, they change the problem! A Life Coach teaches that we can all overcome challenging emotions. Our emotions do not have to control us. We have the power to embrace and use those emotions for a greater good. Life Coaching provides many strategies and solutions to achieving that Highest Intent of joy, happiness and fulfillment. Coaches are the providers of the tools and you are the one that has the power to do the work! You can be empowered with the skills, ideas and strategies to make it easier to create change in your life. At the end of the journey you will know who you are, learn to help yourself, and help those you care about at every level of your being.

Kari Petruch is a Life Coach at Highest Intent Life Coaching in Georgetown, Texas and was trained by Tony Robbins and Cloe Madanes. She practices Strategic Intervention which targets people who need to find balance and strengthen their happiness skills.

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